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Hot Spells

Script[]

(Darkwing Duck and Gosalyn Mallard are at the magic school ground with Morgana Macawber)

Gosalyn Mallard: Keen gear This is one place I can really get into. You must have had a great time going to school here!

Morgana Macawber: Oh, yes, the Eldritch Academy of Enchantment has been the center of Sorcery Studies for thousands of years.

Darkwing Duck: Yeah real Ivy League. Poison ivy. Oh, joy. Another gruesome Macawber reunion.

Moloculo Macawber: Now where is that brilliant daughter of mine?

Morgana Macawber: Father, oh, and Aunt Nasty! So good of you to come.

Moloculo Macawber: Nonsense. We wouldn't miss this for the world.

Aunt Nasty: Not every day a Macawber receive an honor like this, Morgana.

Moloculo Macawber: Imagine, my daughter asked by the Academy to present her groundbreaking paper. Warts And Boils - Medieval Hexes Redefined For A New Age.

Darkwing Duck:

Moloculo Macawber: Still dating a normal, I see. Couldn't you dig up someone better?

Darkwing Duck: Hey hey! She quit digging when she found me, pal.

Moloculo Macawber: Perhaps she needs a new shovel.

Darkwing Duck: Is that your best trick, Blackstone?

Morgana Macawber: Father, Darkwing. Would you please try to get along with each other?

Darkwing Duck:

Moloculo Macawber: Only for your sake, my daughter.

Darkwing Duck: Besides, I know what it's like to be a proud father.

Moloculo Macawber: Oh, really?

Darkwing Duck: Gosalyn! What are you doing up there?

Gosalyn Mallard: You should see the gross stuff they have in here.

Aunt Nasty: I'll get her. Hmm, wouldn't be a bad brew...with a bit of oregano.

Darkwing Duck: Gosalyn, you could have been killed. Yipe! And cooked!

Aunt Nasty: Oh, I was only kidding. Well, gotta run. Stop by my class and I'll show you around.

Morgana Macawber: Oh, Cousin Globby. How nice of you to plop in.

Globby Macawber: Sorry about scaring you like that.

Gosalyn Mallard: I wasn't scared, just lost my grip.

Morgana Macawber: Oh, no, I'm late for my appointment with the Dean. Dean Specter McHex is the most respected man in the paranormal world.

Moloculo: Macawber: Yes, the generations of Macawbers have studied under him.

Globby Macawber: That's funny. No one's here.

Moloculo Macawber: Impossible. The Dean is expecting us.

Darkwing Duck: Maybe went out to find the janitor.

(Darkwing blows the dust of the desk and it forms an old man who is Dean Specter McHex.)

Specter McHex: Watch it, Laddie. When you're as old as I am, there is a fine line 'tween dust and decomposition.

Darkwing Duck: Ma-ma-ma-maybe you should drink more...fluids.

Specter McHex: Hmmp! Let's see how good you look after a millennia or two. Ah. Morgana, it's quite a day for you. Not only is your paper first rate, but the academy is very impressed by your business accomplishments.

Darkwing Duck and Moloculo Macawber: That’s my ghoul.

Specter McHex: I know you have lots to do, but take a moment to visit our advanced classes. Young Master Globby there can show you the way.

Morgana Macawber: It's...the library of forbidden spells. (Dramatic music)

Gosalyn Mallard: So what's the library of forbidden spells? (Dramatic music)

Darkwing Duck: And is it gonna do that every time we say (Whispers) "library of forbidden spells"? (Dramatic music)

Moloculo Macawber: It cannot be helped. Those are the spells and incantations that extract too great a price to be used.

Darkwing Duck: "Too great a price to use." What? Is it in the soft cover edition?

Morgana Macawber: Get serious, Dark. The soul is far too precious a commodity to risk in the quest for easy power.

Morgana Macawber: Magic only looks easy because we do the calculations in our heads. We still have to brew the corequisite potion, let it steep for ages, as long as you remember to burp the Quackerware.

Gosalyn Mallard: This is all so cool! I wish I could ditch regular school and come here.

Moloculo Macawber: Perhaps we could arrange to have Gosalyn sit in on the class.

Gosalyn Mallard: Really? Keen gear.

Moloculo Macawber: She does seem to have a natural feeling for the unnatural.

Aunt Nasty: All right, class, settle down now. Today we will be creating hot liver and spirit vermillion. Like so: So, please have your spider bristles, mugwump ooze and calculators ready.

Gosalyn Mallard: Calculators?

Globby Macawber: You can't create theories without figuring out the logarithms for its ectoplasmatic field.

Gosalyn Mallard: Math is for weenies. Real wizards are not afraid of

Morgana Macawber: Oh I don’t know. Do you think I should redo these in color? I have the time.

Darkwing Duck: Look, Morg, you've already written the paper. If they wanna learn about warts and boils they can just read it for themselves. What's the big deal?

Morgana Macawber: What's the big deal? It's only the most important moment of my entire life! Oh, sorry, Dark. I guess I'm just a little tense.

Darkwing Duck: Heh-heh-heh, a little tense. That's un-un-understandable.

Morgana Macawber: Oh, Dark, don't you see? Dean McHex won't just be judging my paper. They'll be judging me. My demeanor, my style, my ability think on my feet.

Darkwing Duck: (Talking about Gosalyn) She may not be book smart, but she's got great imagination! Just ask her teacher...who ought to be released any day now.

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